Why relationships fail: 10 most common reasons and what to do about them!
We unfortunately live in a day and age where relationships end all the time and people don’t work very hard to preserve them. Fortunately, that’s not going to happen to you because you are reading this article that is going to explain why relationships fail and what you can do to prevent yours from meeting the same fate as so many others!
You might be feeling that your relationship is on the rocks and you’re scared that it might not make it… but I want you to know that if you’re motivated and willing to put forth the effort, you can save and protect it.
The most important thing is going to be pinpointing the issue at hand and working together to overcome it. I often see people recognize what isn’t working, but they never put forth the effort required to restore peace in their relationship. That’s why I always say that you can’t just sit back and wait around for things to change or evolve on their own.
If you want to make sure you and the person you love most on this planet don’t separate, you’ll have to take action!
Can you save a failing relationship?
I know you’re probably feeling pretty stressed out right about now so I’ll save you the suspense and tell you that YES, you can save a failing relationship!
If you’re familiar with my philosophy, you know that I always say that anything is possible in love. The deciding factor is very simple: Whether or not you’re willing to do what it takes to fix it.
I am aware of the fact that it might seem daunting at first because you aren’t quite sure where to start, and you’re afraid of making mistakes, but don’t worry. I am here and you have access to my entire website that is full of tools and techniques for steering clear of relationship failure. You can also reach out to me directly here, and I can help guide you every step of the way.
It’s not going to be a piece of cake, I can tell you that right now, but if you’re proactive and focus on the right actions, you can turn this thing around and restore the love, joy, excitement, and peace that once existed between you and your significant other.
I’d like to remind you of a phrase that we hear so often and tend to underestimate: What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.
Just about it. When you get to the other side of this rough period with your partner, you will be closer than ever. You will have proven to each other that your bond is stronger than the challenges that life presents, and in working to overcome this period, you will see how much you mean to each other.
What you have to do now is take the reigns and start handling what you’re in control of! You are only responsible for your own actions, so instead of focusing on what is making you feel this deep sense of sadness and anxiety, focus on the actions and techniques that you are about to learn right here in this article.
Contrary to what you’re probably thinking or what you may have been taught, the best way to save your relationship isn’t going to consist of incessantly talking about your problems and focusing on everything that isn’t working…
Why relationships fail: The top 10 reasons
I’ve been a love and relationship coach since 2007, so I’ve had quite a bit of time to recognize recurring patterns in failing relationships. I’ve compiled ten of the most common reasons why relationships fail right here so that you can check if you recognize any of them in your relationship. I also have included remedies to start implementing in your daily lives so you can protect your relationship from a breakup!
Without further ado, and in no particular order, here are the top ten reasons relationships fail.
Reasons why relationships fail: Relationship is not a priority
One of the most common reasons relationships fail is when one or both of the partners stop (or never were good at) making the relationship a priority. If work, friends, hobbies, a social life, kids, projects, family, or other responsibilities take up more room in your life than your relationship and you don’t do anything to keep the connection between you and your partner alive, the relationship will suffer.
We aren’t really taught that long term relationships require a certain upkeep, and with time we might begin to neglect our partner. The result is that we drift further and further apart until the relationship is no longer recognizable. This can be especially challenging when you have kids and you have to factor their busy schedules into your own bust schedules!
The best remedy for this is coming up with new activities to share together during which you can reconnect and feel closer. Always make sure that your partner is a priority!
Why relationships fail due to a lack of communication
This one is one of the absolute biggest reasons for relationships failing. Both people in the relationship have to make sure that they express what they need to say in a clear and respectful manner. They also need to make sure that they are showing constructive criticism instead of just criticism or even contempt.
When tensions begin to rise in relationships, people tend to become more impatient and either don’t make the effort to properly express themselves, or they misinterpret what their partner is saying to them.
The best way to fight against this is practice patience, communicate when something is bothering you in a constructive manner, and don’t let important things remain left unsaid. You are a team so issues should be resolved together. Do not view one another as adversaries.
Failed relationships: Trust issues
Another one of the most common reasons relationship ends is related to trust. This can be seen in many forms. For example, a person might have trouble trusting their significant other because of something that happened in their past, or because of something that their partner did. It is hard to establish a solid foundation in a relationship when there is a lack of trust.
It is important to be open and sincere and continually foster trust in your relationship if you want it to last. Many people underestimate the importance of fostering an environment in which their partner feels safe to share everything with them. I often see people that are quick to anger or quick to accuse, and this makes their partner less likely to be open, which in turn leads to more trust issues. You see, it becomes a vicious cycle.
Why relationships end: Compatibility issues
This is a tough one. As time goes on, couples sometimes realize that they aren’t as compatible as they had thought. This typically happens when their relationship budded out of lust instead of love.
If you want to build a relationship that is going to withstand the test of time, it’s important that you pay attention to compatibility. Long term relationships inevitably face challenges and the amount of compatibility between you and your partner are going to be determining factors in how your relationship is going to develop.
Failing relationship because of financial issues
Problems related to money is actually one of the biggest causes of breakups in today’s day and age. It can root back to a person’s upbringing, and their psychological fears linked to trust and control.
It can also affect how two people want to raise their children, and what schools they want their kids to attend. Money has always been something that can cause tensions between people, and it’s important to not allow it to damage your relationship.
The remedy for issues related to money is clear planning and proper communication about financial matters. Both partners need to work to find a common ground that feels fair.
Reasons people break up: Wanting different things
Sometimes people come to me and ask, “Why do relationships fail after 2 years?” They can’t seem to figure out why things were so easy in the beginning and why they feel so unhappy now.
The truth is that once the honey moon stage wears off and the passion begins to transform into something else, people are often faced with the realization that they actually have much less in common than they thought. They realize that they have different values indifferent plans for the future.
They might also realize that they are moving through life at different speeds and that they’re in different places. In the end they begin to drift apart and the breakup begins to loom overhead.
The best way to fight against this is to always be open about your goals and work to factor your partner into your idea of the future.
Reasons why relationships fail: The routine
One of the most common reasons why longterm relationships fail is that things begin to feel stagnant in the relationship. As time goes on, people settle into the relationship and stop courting each other. The result is that their partner begins to feel under-appreciated and/or bored.
This issue has a pretty simple fix – you just have to take the time to implement it into your daily lives. Always think of new things to share together and keep the flame burning. Don’t allow your partner to feel like things are becoming predictable. There are all kinds of things that you can do to spice things up in the relationship from heating things up in the bedroom to planning activities that you’ve never done before!
Why do relationships fail: Selfishness
If you want to know how to make a relationship last, you have to guard against selfishness. It is of course important to make sure that you’re satisfied with your personal life, but your partner shouldn’t be suffering as a result.
You have to help your partner with the responsibilities that come with having a family and you can’t always only focus on what you want to be doing. Relationships are about giving and taking and being a support system for the other person (in a variety of different ways).
In order to make a relationship last, you have to know how to put your partner first and be careful to not be oblivious to or unconcerned with their needs (mentally, in terms of the relationship, sharing responsibilities, and sexually).
Relationships often end because of infidelity
Infidelity is one of the most common reasons for the demise of a relationship. When trust is broken by a physical or emotional affair, it is very difficult to restore. As trust is one of the pillars of a healthy relationship, it is easy to see why this would result in a separation.
Infidelity can make a person feel betrayed, insecure and angry, which creates a barrier between them and their partner.
The trauma that accompanies cheating can be overcome, but it will require a valiant effort from both people in the relationship. The best thing to do is to spend ample quality time together to restore complicity and the bond that existed between you. If you feel that you are struggling with this type of situation, don’t hesitate to get in touch with me directly for one on one guidance right here.
Not thinking that your partner is The One is one of the most common reasons why relationships end
Sometimes I see that people are in a relationship with someone because they feel that it’s convenient for now. They don’t see this person as their soul mate. It’s more of a relationship based on convenience…
If you’re with someone and you don’t think that it’s that serious, it’s normal that you wouldn’t invest in the relationship lasting. The problem arises when one of the two people see it as a long term committed relationship when the other does not.
Once again, communication is the key for making sure that you and your significant other are on the right page.
As I said, please don’t hesitate to get in touch with me for one on one guidance. Every relationship goes through challenging periods, but it’s always beneficial to have a helping hand that can get you to the other side of these trying times as quickly as possible.
Sincerely,
Your coach for knowing why relationships fail and how you can prevent this from happening,
Alexandre Cormont
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