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How To Be Sexy? A Man Guides You Step by Step!

by | October 4th 2018 | 5 comments

When it comes to being sexy, there is one thing that can be a complete game changer. It’s not about what you wear, it’s not about what you say, and it’s not about what you look like…

Are you looking for the best way to feel sexy and attractive? Do you have your eye on a special someone that you’d like to seduce? Do you want to know how to be a real femme fatale? I wanted to write this article today on how to be sexy and feel great about yourself!

With the help of a survey I conducted on my Facebook page, I have found that one of the biggest questions that women have is “How to be sexy?” Whether you want to know how to attract the man of your dreams or how to feel great in your body, you are going to find the most important tool for doing just that in this article!

How to be sexy: The most important thing to know!

I bet you know what I’m going to say here. There is nothing sexier than a confident woman. If you want to know how to be sexy, you need to start feeling great about yourself.

A lot of people make the mistake of thinking that they need to pretend to be someone else when they want to feel sexy and Attract a man. The truth is that every single person is unique and brings something special to the table. When you know how to highlight and showcase your best qualities, you will start to feel much more confident, which in turn will make you start feeling sexier and sexier.

There are various things that you can do to start feeling more attractive as well, and I am going to go over these things throughout this article. There are so many things that you can do to start feeling great, and the great news is that you can get started today.

How to make him think you are sexy The fact that you’ve done some research and have sought out this article means that you’re ready to take action! I always tell the women that I coach that nothing will change if they just sit around expecting things to happen on their own.

If you want to feel sexy, it’s up to you to figure out why you don’t feel sexy and what you can do about it!

Why is being sexy important?

Sure, it’s easy to feel sexy when you’re a Victoria’s Secret model, but do you have to look like that in order to feel good about yourself and confident in what you bring to the table? Of course not! Besides, even some of the most exquisitely beautiful women struggle with issues related to self confidence.

This is why I’m saying that it doesn’t matter if you’re the most beautiful woman on the face of the planet or not – if you are not feeling confident, you’re not going to feel sexy.

So what I’d like to say here is that most important thing is to feel sexy, and that is entirely under your control. It’s important to feel sexy because we unfortunately live in a society where far too many people don’t love themselves and are not proud of who they are. The media presents us with impossible standards of what is beautiful and what is sexy – and we live in a culture that could benefit from more promotion of positive body image.

The media promotes extreme dieting to be as thin as possible and it frowns upon aging, and while fortunately there is a movement that encourages positive body image and self-acceptance, there are still so many women that will try anything to get rid of a few wrinkles or a few pounds.

My goal for this article on how to be sexier is to give you the tools for learning how to become the best version of yourself and feeling confident and sexy as a result. I’m not going to tell you to act like someone else just to attract someone.

My goal is to show you how to be sexy by being YOU.

There are multiple reasons for this. First of all, you don’t need to be someone else to get attention from a person. If you learn how to showcase your best qualities and be confident in your allure, you’ll attract men like moths to a flame. Secondly, if you’re looking to seduce someone in particular, acting like someone else just to get them is not going to get you anywhere.

Think about it – you make him fall for you, and then you have to keep acting like someone else? Or he figures out that you weren’t being yourself and then things get tense…

Sure this tactic might work if you want a one night stand, but if you want something that’s actually going to last you’re going to have to be yourself and put your best foot forward!

How to be sexier on a daily basis in 6 steps

When you’re thinking about how to be sexy, there are a few keys that you’ve got to master, and I want to outline them here for you.

1. Accept your flaws

This is one of THE most important things to do! You have to learn to love yourself and be your own ally when you’re working on being sexier.

2. Develop your OWN ideal image

Think about what you find to be beautiful, what you find to be sexy, what makes you happy, what makes you feel alive, and what lights a fire in your soul.

Your idea of beauty is more important than someone else’s, and this will help you set a clear goal.

3. Focus on yourself

One of the absolute worst things people when they want to be sexier is compare themselves to others. Focus on who you are and what you bring to the table. Focus on centering yourself. You can use tools like yoga, tai-chi, or meditation to help with this!

woman wants to be more sexy

4. Make conscious decisions geared towards your goals

Have a clear picture of what you want and make sure that your choices get you closer to your goals. Instead of trying everything and anything, make sure you’re focused and that you think about what exactly you want.

5. Maintain a positive state of mind

Work to clear out any negative thoughts and develop a positive sense of self. Replace any negativity with creativity, lightheartedness and confidence. If you find that you’re struggling with this, working with a coach can really help.

6. Take action!

Go through your closet and get rid of anything you don’t feel good about, check out style blogs or work with a stylist, and go shopping with friends. This way, you’ll feel confident about your purchases if you were feeling unsure. One of the best ways to feel sexy is to feel good about how you’re presenting yourself.

How to become sexy: The power of a genuine smile

I’m sure you can picture what I’m talking about when I describe a woman who is radient. She exudes joy and contentment, and she has a magnetic smile. Who wouldn’t want to be around someone like that? Being sexy doesn’t mean that you have to look like Jessica Rabbit. It’s about being something that others want to be around.

I’m not saying that you need to be smiling at all times, even when you’re not feeling it. What I am saying is that it’s important to cultivate inner happiness and the ability to be open to others so that you can establish and maintain a magnetic personality that attracts others like moths to a flame.

A genuine smile communicates that you really are enjoying talking to someone, which in turn makes them feel great as well.

Of course it’s challenging to smile at someone who’s done you wrong, but I encourage you to share your smile with people that will smile back, as this shows that they’re on the same page as you. It’s a great way to attract a like-minded individual.

The secret to know how to be more sexy: Love yourself!

If you want to be sexy, you have to love yourself.

beautiful and sexy womanI so often see that people have great difficulty in seeing themselves in a positive light. They fixate on things they don’t like about themselves whether they’re physical attributes or characteristics like shyness or awkwardness.

You need to change the way you see “flaws.” For example, I have heard people say, “How could anyone think I’m hot with this nose?” “I am so awkward that guys just think I’m weird.” “I’m ugly and no one even notices me.”

When I hear things like this, I immediately begin working with my coachee on self confidence. We start by reconditioning the way my coachee talks and thinks about themselves… For example, “There is someone that will love me as I love them, and this has nothing to do with the way my nose looks or doesn’t look.” “Sure, I might be a little goofy sometimes but that doesn’t mean that someone isn’t going to find it charming and endearing.” “I am brilliant and I am not going to be afraid to show this quality when I am meeting people.”

Being sexy is about loving and accepting everything about yourself and being proud of who you are. People pick up on confidence very quickly and if you’re confident in what you bring to the table, they will be intrigued as well.

As I said, don’t compare yourself to other people when you want to know how to be sexy! Besides, if we were all the same things would be rather boring, don’t you think?

You have to really get to know yourself and know how to highlight your favorite things about yourself.

The importance of physical health to look sexy

When it comes to looking and feeling sexy, physical exercise is one of the biggest tools, and it’s not just because it physically improves your body. It also improves your mood and energy levels, which makes it considerably easier to have positive exchanges with people that you’re attracted to.

If you haven’t, I encourage you to begin going to the gym or trying new activities like yoga or boxing. Physical changes will come fast, but do will mental ones. If you’re diligent about this, you will find that you will begin to feel sexier in no time.

Dressing sexy and feeling good in what you’re wearing is important, and I will get to that in a moment, but how you feel on the inside is what’s going to make the biggest different. I know, I’m being cheeseball, but it’s very true. If you’re not feeling good about yourself, you’re going to be more likely to attract surface level relationships.

How to be sexyBeing physically healthy is also sexy because it reflects that you take care of yourself and love yourself.

People are attracted to what they want to be like, so always make sure that you’re working on being the best version of yourself.

Now I’m sure that you’d like to get some tips on how to dress sexy as well, so let’s dive in!

Girls, don’t forget to wear the right clothe!

Whether you have your eye on a special someone or not, there are certain ways to dress that are certain to catch a person’s attention.

I would say that the easiest thing to remember is this: Less isn’t necessarily more. You don’t have to be scantily clad if you want to be considered sexy.

Choose one thing that you love about your body and accentuate it. For example, if you have great legs, wear fitted pants or a shorter dress or skirt, and leave the rest covered. If you’re wearing a shorter skirt, you don’t have to wear a low cut top as well. It’s good to leave something to the imagination and leave him wanting more.

Think of it as giving him a taste, a little appetizer if you will, and whet his appetite for more.

In my opinion, the sexiest woman knows how to keep it simple when it comes to her clothes, so that they don’t distract from her personality. Focus on shapes that are flattering and colors that look good on you. You can embellish with sexy jewelry that subtly draws the eye to your skin.

One of the things that is regularly associated with sexy clothing is lace, so adding a bit of it doesn’t hurt – even if it’s just some trim on a blouse.

Red is a powerful color when it comes to clothing. It is associated with passion and fire, and if you feel comfortable wearing it, go for it!

If you want to take it to the next level, you can wear a slightly sheer top. Remember, totally see-through moves away from subtle and leaving things to the imagination. Remain tasteful and spark his imagination. Pay attention to the fabrics that you’re wearing.

Silks and linens are beautiful but can sometimes become unflattering because of the way they wrinkle and cling on the body. Heavier fabrics can be great because of the way they drape. If something is too bulky, you can always wear a belt around the waist. Though you shouldn’t show too much skin, you also don’t want to hide your body away under too many fabrics. You can be covered, but think about revealing some of your natural shapes.

Speaking of showing skin, think about what skin you want to show. Remember, men ARE visual creatures so you can use this to your advantage when you’re thinking about how to dress classy and sexy at the same time. There are certain things that you can do with your hair as well to draw the eye and signal confidence. For example, wearing your hair pulled away from your face.

how to feel sexyI think that shoulders are one of the sexiest things that women can show and they don’t get enough exposure. Off the shoulder tops and sweaters are sexy and understated.

Heels are always sexy. Simple dresses (think “little black dress”) are always sexy. Backless tops or dresses during dates are always enticing as well…

Think about what makes you feel sexy and confident, and let the clothes amplify your attitude.

I often hear people saying, “Dress sexy for your age,” and while it’s true, you might not feel comfortable in the same outfit at age 20 and at age 65, you don’t have to rule anything out that makes you feel sexy and good about your body. If you have the confidence to wear something that brings you joy, wear it. After all, clothing is a way to express yourself.

More than the clothes that are on your body, it’s the attitude that you present that is going to make the biggest difference!

How to get sexy: What to avoid!

The biggest thing to avoid when you’re thinking, “I want to be sexier” is doing anything that makes you uncomfortable.

Yes, it’s good to step outside of your comfort zone and try new things, but if you find yourself doing things that don’t make you feel good just for the sake of making someone think you’re sexy, well, you’re not on the right path.

If you hear that men think that heels are sexy, and you don’t like the way you feel in them, then you don’t have to wear them! Try out different styles, while keeping in mind that you should focus on what looks best on your body. Don’t hesitate to ask your friends for their opinions on what looks good and what doesn’t.

Don’t pretend to be someone you’re not just to make someone find you attractive. I know I keep harping on it but you truly do have to be yourself if you want to be genuinely sexy!

There are a lot of “rules” floating around out there, but it boils down to what makes you feel good about yourself and what boosts your self-esteem.

Make sure you also pay attention to your body language. Stand up straight and tall and look people directly in the eye. Think about it – even if you’re wearing the sexiest outfit your love interest has ever seen, and yet you sit with hunched shoulders, gnawing the straw in your drink, nervously staring at the floor with your arms crossed, well…

You aren’t going to be sending the right image of yourself!

For the best result, you want to have a sexy attitude and pair it with an image of yourself that makes you feel sexy.

As always, I am here to help so don’t hesitate to leave your comment below or get in touch with me directly here!


Wishing you all the best,

Your coach for knowing how to be sexy,

Alex Cormont


  1. Avatar

    I like this article about how to be sexy because you really appreciate a woman being her. As a real man should. Alex, why do you think men are attracted to a lot of superficial things to a woman?
    Thank you!

    • Alex Cormont

      Rebecca, Men (a lot of men) are looking at your beauty and physical attraction first. This is part of our nature but then, quickly, we are looking for something bigger. This is why I consider being sexy as being yourself 🙂

  2. Avatar

    I have a fashion question. I know you have said that men like feminine looking women. But one thing that is in style is mixing the masculine with the feminine. For example, wearing combat boots or big sneakers (“dad shoes”) with a flirty dress.

    From a man’s perspective, does such a way of dressing look good? Or do you think men prefer a woman to dress feminine from head to toe?

    I have included a few photos of what I mean:


    • Alex Cormont

      Hi Jessica,
      Thank you for reading my blog, How To Be Sexy. Both models are looking attractive and comfortable. A man appreciates a woman that can look both professional and playful when the occasion calls for it.

    • Avatar

      Alex, thank you for sharing your thoughts! This is something I have always wondered! Now for me to try to achieve a figure like the ladies in the photos…it’s not easy! 🙂

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"What if the true definition of love was not what you thought it was?"
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Alex Cormont

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