Want a private consultation? Call us at 754.230.1416

How to Flirt Over Text with Examples – The French Relationship Expert

by | August 12th 2022 | 0 comments

Someone has caught your eye. You now have his phone number and you’re wondering how to flirt over text and make him fall for you! You’re fully aware of the fact that your cellphone is an incredible tool for seducing someone!

There are certain do’s and don’ts, and in this article, I am going to reveal all the secrets that will ensure that you find the perfect balance and the perfect seduction technique. If you want to know how to flirt over text with someone you’ve got your eye on, you’ve come to the right place!

Following the simple rules I am about to present to you is going to considerably increase your odds of success. You’ll know how to stand out from the crowd and make this guy really start to get attached to you. Flirting with the person you like via text messages truly is one of the best ways to seduce them without putting too much pressure on the situation. It’s quite possibly the best tool for finding the perfect balance!

1. Flirting over text makes it easy to catch a guy’s attention

I’m going to reveal one of the most important things to you right off the bat. When it comes to flirting through text, you want to show this person that you aren’t like everybody else. The truth is that texts make it really easy for you to show your ‘target’ that you’re someone special.

Not to mention, it also works if you just want something casual! It’s just going to make everything considerably easier and you’re going to save a lot of time. You get to stay in your comfort zone, and you remove a great deal of pressure from the situation.

When you begin to flirt through texts, you put the other person (and yourself) at ease, even if it’s completely subconscious. It’s very important to be very subtle in your approach and not give yourself away immediately. A lot of people don’t react positively when they can see someone coming from a mile away and know that they’re actively trying to seduce them.

For many people, this is too invasive and they feel too much pressure, which in turn will make them pull away. We don’t want that! Knowing the best ways to flirt over text messages will allow you to keep things feeling easy and fun, and this is the key to success.

Not to mention, knowing that you are flirting and texting with your crush keeps you at a comfortable distance as things are starting off. I know that in the beginning, a lot of people tend to seize up and put too much pressure on themselves to be perfect. When they’re face to face with the person they want, they have trouble being themselves because they’re so stressed about thinking on their feet and making sure that they’re always prepared with the perfect thing to say.

Being flirty with the person you want through texts is actually a great way to warm up to meeting face to face. Once you’ve gotten to chat a bit, you’ll have an easier time feeling at ease in person.

What’s more, the importance of being discrete about your intentions in the very beginning should not be underestimated. You want to make this person begin to wonder if you’re actually into them or if this is just your personality.

You can use this opportunity to plant a seed of doubt in this person’s head that makes them pay much closer attention to you. You want them to ask themselves if they’re something special to you or not…

Another great thing about flirting via texting is that you can do it at any given moment. All you need to do is make sure you know how to be patient and not expect an immediate response. You can text when you’re feeling confident and when you have something funny or charming to say. The other person will respond when they have the time, so you don’t have to worry about thinking on your feet and being 1000% prepared all the time.

2. The 5 golden rules on how to flirt over text

As I said above, in order to successfully flirt with someone via texts, you have to follow certain rules. I wanted to dedicate a section of this article to outlining the most important things to make sure you do, and what to make sure you avoid at all costs!

To start things off, here are 5 things to keep in mind:

1. Keep it fun and light-hearted. Flirting should be fun, so don’t send messages like “I’m not sure if you’re enjoying talking to me because you take so long to respond…” Keep it positive!
“Do you like it when someone makes the first move?”
“I think I’ve got a crush on you… What are you going to do about that?”
“You were in my dream last night. I would tell you about it but it’s super inappropriate ;-)”

2. Keep it short and sweet.
I have noticed that people who receive paragraph-long text messages in the flirting stage tend to get turned off.

3. Pay attention to opportune times to offer thoughtful compliments (but don’t overdo it!)
“No one has ever made me laugh like you do!”
“I feel really inspired by the way you keep in touch with your family/friends. It made my call up (someone special to you) and catch up. It felt so good!”

4. Remember to ask questions.
People love to talk about themselves, especially when they can tell that the other person cares. I’ll dive into some thoughtful ones in a moment…

5. Avoid coming on too strong.
This can be a big turn-off, especially when it’s premature. There is an art to building tension and mystery, so make sure you leave some room for doubt in the beginning stages. If you come on too strong, you run the risk of looking desperate, which is one of the biggest things to avoid.

You want to establish a real connection with this person and prove to them that you aren’t like every other person that’s going to try and hit on him.

You can use texting to build sexual tension, and especially to build complicity. Making each other laugh and flirting are the perfect ways to get closer.

One of the best tricks for knowing how to be flirty with texts is putting yourself in this guy’s shoes. If you were to receive the text you’re about to send, how would you react?

Would it make you laugh, would it make you smile, or would you be creeped out? Being flirty with text messages is an art form in and of itself, so use this tool to pull him closer instead of pushing him away.

Make sure that you’re always having fun and don’t ever try to pressure him (or yourself) because this is when things get awkward.

Come up with interesting things to ask him and tell him about. No one wants to be asked the same question twenty other people have already asked. Take a moment to think about some questions that would allow you to really get to know this other person. When you’re talking, make sure that you pay attention to their answers and bring them back into the conversation later on!

For example, you can text:

“Where do you see yourself in ten years?”

“If money didn’t matter, what would you like to do for a living?”

“What is the funniest thing that’s ever happened to you?”

And then you will sprinkle in the flirt…

“What is your biggest regret? Mine is not stealing a kiss last night.”

You want this guy to think positively of you after each text conversation, so pay attention to what you’re sending – even when you aren’t being “flirty.” It shouldn’t be unpleasant or boring for either of you. Start developing some inside jokes and pay attention to what kinds of texts get a good reaction from him.

If you know him a bit already, send them a text that pertains to a band or a hobby they like, and if you don’t know him well, ask them about what kind of things they like. Once you get closer, it’ll be considerably easier to start to flirt over text!

3. There are things to avoid saying!

When it comes to knowing how to be flirty with someone via text, it could be said that it’s even more important to know what NOT to say!

Some people just don’t realize that the text messages they’re sending are not at all what the other person wants to read, and they end up digging themselves in a hole.

The good news is that there are probably more good things to say when you’re flirting with someone than bad things to say, so I’m going to make it really simple.

Don’t say anything that makes you look desperate, needy, or clingy! You want this guy to feel that you’ve got a really interesting life, and you want him to feel inspired to be a part of it. You DON’T want him to think that your entire universe revolves around him, and especially not right in the beginning. This will turn a person off in the blink of an eye. Remember, men like the chase.

Moreover, if you’re too over the top and too forward, then you damage the mystery. You want to be charming, mysterious, and not at this guy’s beck and call. People respond well to an exciting challenge – not someone who’s always there, trying to get their attention.

If you’re not getting an answer to your text, be patient. Don’t be pushy. If not, you run the risk of annoying him and making him want to have nothing to do with you.

Another thing to keep in mind when it comes to ways to be flirty over text is that you’re eventually going to have to graduate to flirting in real life with the person you like. You don’t want to remain in a virtual relationship.

One of the cons of flirting through texts is that sometimes they can be misinterpreted and you will misunderstand each other. Sometimes it’s hard to understand the way someone intended a message, so my advice is to stick to one subject per text, and always read it to make sure that your text is clear.

I do notice that a lot of people unintentionally fall into the friend zone by sending too many “friendly” text messages. Finding the sweet spot between chatting and having fun and exciting, flirty conversations and being distant is going to keep you safe from becoming your crush’s “buddy.” This is another good reason why it’s important to see each other in real life as well.

To dive deeper, I encourage you to check out the in-depth video on the ins and outs of flirting with a man by clicking here! Whether it’s via text or not, I want to make you an expert in all things flirtation so that you can get the guy you want and create the relationship of your dreams.

The last thing I want to warn you against saying is anything that’s too sexually explicit or forward right off the bat. You have to give that time (unless you’ve met on a dating site that is specifically for this type of exchange) and let it happen naturally. You two can turn up the heat but it has to feel natural and shouldn’t come out of the blue!

Go have some fun!


Your coach for knowing how to flirt over text,

Alex Cormont


Submit a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

About Alex

"What if the true definition of love was not what you thought it was?"
It’s time to make your own.

Alex Cormont

Special offer

Discover the 20 secrets to find happiness in love

About Alex