10 Expert Tips For Becoming A Seductress!
Very many women come to me for coaching on how to be more seductive and are somewhat surprised when I tell them what the key is. Many people have a skewed view of what it means to be seductive and I see that this term sometimes has a negative connotation… In my opinion, a seductive woman is someone who knows what she brings to the table and can confidently make a man fall for her without having to pretend to be someone else.
But this is harder for some women than for others, so does this mean that it’s really hard to be seductive? Are there things that you can start doing today to become a seductress and make any man fall for you? The answer is YES, you can become a seductress and I am going to show you how with 10 tips.
Becoming the woman you’ve always wanted to be should be your number one goal in life, and this is going to directly affect your ability to be a seductress!
What exactly is a seductress?
As I said, the word “seductress” gets a bad rep. When we hear the word seductress we instantly get an image of a temptress that leaves men drooling as she walks through the room… Or with their eyes bulging out of their heads à la Jessica Rabbit! While some women might want this type of attention, not all women who want to feel seductive want to be perceived in this way.
Now, another thing I’ve heard before is that a seductress is basically the same thing as a home-wrecker, but I find this to be quite silly. You don’t have to steal another woman’s man if you want to be considered seductive!
The last preconceived notion I’d like to debunk about what it means to be seductive is that you have to be impossibly beautiful. Seductiveness isn’t synonymous with physical beauty. The most important element of seductiveness is loving yourself and being confident about what you bring to the table.
So, what is a seductress? Before I go into my explanation of the term, I’d like to invite you to leave your comment below about your interpretation of what this word means and what you think is most seductive about a person! Similarly, if you have any questions you can leave them below and I’d be more than happy to reply to you.
In my opinion, a seductress is a woman who presents an exciting challenge, a woman who can be in control of any situation, and a woman who is confident about herself. She doesn’t try to be like others - she knows that she is special and she’s not going to beg for anyone’s attention. She isn’t easily attainable and her confidence makes her magnetic and attractive. She doesn’t flirt with just everyone; only a man of interest to her. She’s naturally sexy and knows how to highlight her most attractive qualities.
So I think you can see where I’m going here. What is the key ingredient? Confidence!
How to be a seductress starting today
Before we go into the specifics, I wanted to go over some general tips for being a seductress. One of the more important things to keep in mind when you want to seduce someone is body language.
Just think about it, you can be the most strikingly beautiful woman in the entire universe, but if your body language makes you seem like you aren’t confident or like you are quite uncomfortable, you are going to give your target a very different image of yourself. Now, if you know how to adopt proper body language, your odds of making him fall for you are going to skyrocket. Sure, some men like shy, timid women, but a seductress is confident and magnetic for this very reason.
Look him directly in the eye when you’re speaking to one another. Square your shoulders to face him and don’t hesitate to smile. It’s ideal to be inviting and to make him want to spend more time with you. I see a lot of people making the mistake of thinking that a seductress has to be cold and maybe even borderline mean, but that doesn’t need to be the case.
So think about being tactile as well. For example, touch his arm when he makes you laugh.
Think about the way he’s seeing you and think about the image you’re portraying.
Let’s take a look at some of the things you can start doing today so that you can start feeling and being more seductive!
1. Maintain a bit of mystery… And this goes for both clothing and actions. You don’t have to be scantily clad to seduce a man, and you don’t need to tell him about your intentions. In fact, it’s best if he’s not sure whether or not you’re into him. The more he gets to mull it over and begin to wonder if you’re interested, the more likely it is that his interest will be peaked as well! So let him wonder and hope and make him want to work for it. Don’t flat out tell him that you want him, and don’t chase after him.
2. Always remember to have fun. I often see people start to put unnecessary pressure on themselves and on the relationship by focusing too much on the future, where things are going, and they begin to obsess over little things. Adopting a reasonable, carefree attitude further illustrates how good you feel in your skin, with or without your man.
3. Make your conversations and the time you spend together interesting. It’s pretty straightforward - the more a man enjoys spending time with you, the more likely he will be to always come back for more! Playing too hard to get could result in your target simply losing interest.
Seducing a man isn’t just physical. In fact, the physical aspect is actually minimal. Stimulating a man mentally is the way to deepen his attraction to you. Of course, physical attraction is important and exciting, but more is needed if you want to make a bond that lasts for a long time. So, make sure you’re curious, that you’re learning, that you’re open to new experiences, and don’t be afraid to share this experience and knowledge with this man. Fascinating people attract others!
4. Make sure that you always have your own thing going on. So many people lose track of their own goals and projects when they begin dating someone... Don’t fall into this trap because maintaining personal life and doing the things that are important to you are some of the sexiest qualities a person can have. One of the best ways to be seductive is by maintaining your independence and showing him that you don’t need him all the time. When someone is too readily available all the time no matter what... The mystery and the challenge are no longer present.
5. If you work with him, show him that you work hard and are passionate about your projects but you also know how to have fun. A driven woman is very attractive, and if you combine that with your confident attitude, and you can bet that men will be sneaking peeks at you left and right across the office. If on top of that you let your hair down at the end of the day today, and self-assuredly walk out of there, chances are you’ll spark some fantasies...
Seductresses: Here’s what to avoid doing!
No article on being a seductress would be complete without a section dedicated to what not to do if you want him to fall for you. Many people have a set idea of what it means to be a seductress and they end up acting in ways that they expect a seductress to act, but the result is simply that the man they want loses interest.
First of all, and like I said above, it’s important that you do not reveal your intentions! He shouldn’t know that you’re actively trying to seduce him. This would make it too easy for him to think that he’s got you under his thumb and then the mystery and excitement evaporate into thin air.
Here is something that is very important! I was working with a coachee who had trouble seducing men she was interested in because of the way she was interacting with them. She had been thinking that by being confident, she also needed to emasculate the guy…
Don’t put the guy down or laugh at him if he’s being sincere. Sure, you want to be hard to get, but not to the point where he would no longer want to even try!
Men typically don’t like being treated like a boy or being spoken to in a condescending manner.
Another thing to pay attention to is making sure that you’re not being needy or clingy. Begging for his attention is not going to boost his excitement. If you want to be a seductress, you want to give him the opportunity to hope you call him, to hope he gets a chance to see you. He should see that you’ve got your own thing going on, and he’s not the only thing on your mind.
How to be sexy and seductive by remaining independent
When we’re talking about how to seduce someone and how to be seductive, we tend to focus on what to do when you’re together. Truth be told, you can make a guy want you even when you’re not physically in the same place. The trick is to show him that you don’t actually need him.
I know it might sound funny when you first read that, but think about it. You’re a strong, busy woman who is enjoying her life, seeing her friends, focusing on her projects. You’re not always calling him and you don’t always have time to see him. When you do see him, he feels excited that he’s finally gotten you all to himself, so it’s automatically easier for you to seduce him!
You can actually use social media as a great tool for this. Post pictures on Facebook or Instagram of the fun and exciting things you’ve been doing either on your own or with friends, and he will want to be a part of it!
If you’ve already started dating, instead of focusing on the relationship and on just always being together, shift your focus to spending special moments together, and to experience new things. Freshness is one of the most alluring elements a relationship can have. This is really important because a lot of women tend to fixate on the relationship (and not on how to charm a guy and keep things exciting,) and in turn end up letting it become a bit stale! Always make sure you do what’s in your power to keep the relationship safe from monotony or too much predictability.
If you really want to get creative with seduction, use the 5 senses!
1. The sense of sight
Men are visual creatures and this can be used to your advantage. Let him feast his eyes upon you... But like I said above, not all of you. Less is definitely more, especially in the early phases of dating or seducing someone.
Studies have shown that both men and women seem to associate the color red with passion and desire. No one is quite sure why... Perhaps because it makes us think of red roses or Valentine’s Day. Whatever the reason may be, use it to your advantage! Another one of the best ways to seduce a man is catching his attention with what’s on your body. On your next date, wear a red dress or a red blouse. Red lipstick looks great too, but use your judgment because some men might be less prone to kissing red as they don’t want to end up wearing the lipstick as well…
2. The sense of smell
You, of course, want to smell good and have fresh breath, but the sense of smell goes much further than just hygiene. If you’re looking for sexy ideas for how to seduce a man, start thinking about getting him addicted to your scent. Everyone has their own specific scent, and once you get close enough to smell it, you can pick up on it and be hooked. Though we don’t often think about this because it’s a subconscious, primal instinct, it doesn’t mean we can’t play with it!
You might be wondering how you can make him fall for you by using the sense of smell… Well, here’s an example; If you’re saying goodbye at the end of an evening, hug him and let the hug linger for a bit. Give him a moment to actually be very close to you and subconsciously pick up on the intimacy of being so close to your skin.
Another thing you can do is this: Spray a small amount of your favorite perfume into your hair and put it up in a ponytail. When you’re next to him, let your hair down and he’ll get a surprising whiff of your signature scent and he’ll instantly feel closer to you and more intimate. You’ve heard that smell is the strongest sense tied to memory right?
This is an especially useful tool if you’re already beginning to date the guy you’ve had your eye on. Many women don’t talk about what turns them on to their guy… So if the opportunity presents itself, why not whisper something naughty in his ear?
You can do it when you’re alone, but you could also do it in public. While you’re with friends, whisper what you want to do to him later, and then continue talking your conversation with the others. He will be wondering if he heard that correctly and his interest will be sparked. I bet he’ll have trouble concentrating on the rest of the conversation with the group after that!
4. The sense of taste
This is also a bit easier if you’re already being intimate with this man. You can use a blindfold and doesn’t even have to be in the bedroom. It can be at the dinner table and you can start to feed him and play with your food.
When one of these five senses is taken away, the other ones are heightened. If you’re giving him a cherry, let it graze his lips. Then, when he least expects it, instead of getting something to eat, let him feel your lips against his. The element of surprise, the blindfold, and the fact that you’re so in control will definitely turn him on.
5. The sense of touch
The sense of touch goes hand in hand with the element of body language that I was going over above. That said, be careful not to overdo it! Avoid touching him incessantly because it can get weird. Instead, catch him off guard with your leg touching his under the table.
If it’s the earliest stages of your endeavor, you’ll want to opt for more subtle seduction techniques such as conversation, light touches, and body language. In conversation you want him to start to wonder if you’re genuinely interested in him, and make him want to continue sharing details about himself with you. If he’s telling you about one of his passions, ask him pertinent questions and let him know that you’re paying attention.
Word to the wise: Don’t stop being a seductress once you’re in a relationship with him!
Many people make the mistake of being very seductive up until they secure a relationship with their target. They don’t do it on purpose - they just subconsciously assume that they don’t need to try to seduce him anymore because they’re already together.
The truth is that the death of passion leads to the end of many relationships, so preserving seduction is actually the key to maintaining an exciting relationship that never gets boring.
The way to keep seduction alive in a relationship is simply to be innovative. Invite your partner to do things you’ve never done before, or to go places you’ve never seen before. You can continue seducing your man by surprising him with some new lingerie or keys to a hotel room for the night.
Passion and excitement are important at any stage of the relationship - even if you’ve been together for twenty years! Human beings need to feel stimulated, and this is one of the keys to helping your relationship withstand the test of time.
Your relationship expert for knowing how to be a seductress